Nori's Notebook: Your Favorite North West Parody Recaps Khloe's Baby Shower & Kylie's Post-Baby Body Struggles

Mommy also reveals that DadYe wants a total of seven kids. I’m telling you right now, if that happens, I will move out and sue for my inheritance.

The woman behind Nori’s Black Book — a viral parody Instagram account written entirely in the voice of Kim Kardashian’s sassy 5-year-old daughter — is bringing her talents to TooFab.

Each week, "Nori" will be recapping new episodes of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" and giving us HER take on all the family drama.

(NOTE: The below was not actually written by North West.)

Sunday’s "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" opened with Auntie Khloe’s baby shower. The shower took place at the same hotel Auntie Khloe met Tristan Thompson. It was cute, but Auntie Khloe doesn’t have any celebrity friends, so the crowd was a little Z-list for my taste. When the Malikas are the most famous people at your party, it’s very telling. I didn’t attend the shower because, by then, I was over baby showers. I went to Stormi’s and Chi’s. That was enough.

Later, Mommy showed everyone’s favorite "Why Are You Here" girl, Larsa, her new condo. The condo is supposed to be primarily for work, but she can see herself giving it to me or one of my siblings. I predict Saint going down the same road as Uncle Rob, so he’ll probably need to move in eventually. While at the condo, Mommy revealed that DadYe wants a total of seven kids. I’m telling you right now, if that happens, I will move out and sue for my inheritance.

Later, the family shot a major campaign for Calvin Klein. Auntie Kylie was feeling insecure about her post-baby body, but everyone was assuring her she looked great. It’s not easy losing weight after bringing a child into this world, just ask Uncle Rob. After the shoot, Auntie Khloe left for Cleveland where she planned to give birth to her baby.

In between his busy schedule of going to Miami and picking up Sofia from school, Scott managed to squeeze in a visit to Auntie Khloe in Cleveland. Since there’s nothing to do in Cleveland, Auntie Khloe and Scott decided to revive their podcast, "The Lord and The Lady." Good idea in theory, but because Auntie Khloe was nine months pregnant, she didn’t have the energy for a podcast — leaving Scott out of work yet again.

I’ve chosen to distance myself as much as possible from DadYe’s political views, so I decided to attend the "March For Our Lives" march for gun control in Washington, D.C. It’s important that I stay involved and play an active role in bettering our country. I also saw Demi Lovato and Miley Cyrus at the march. They wanted pictures and autographs, but I told them that wasn’t the time or place for that.

Back in Calabasas, Auntie Kylie purged her closet of all the clothes she couldn’t fit in anymore. She was still feeling insecure about her body and her newfound curves. Mommy told her she should wear two to three pairs of shapewear and just get out of the house. She gave Uncle Rob the same advice after Dream was born.

Meet me back here next week when I recap Episode 12 of my show.

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